Chapter Text
For her 17th birthday, Kate's new friend Maggie insists on taking her to the mall to get a makeover, like they do in teen movies. She gets to play as a preppy, girly girl for the entire afternoon and it is hilarious. They end up buying graphic tees at Hot Topic and finish the day by going to the theater to see Guardians of The Galaxy Vol.2. It slaps way more than Kate is willing to admit, and she figures she'll re-watch it with Cy some time soon.
On her way back home, she reviews the whole day and can't believe how lucky she is to have made this new friend. Someone who has similar interests as her, and who's nice enough to go out of her way to celebrate someone else's birthday? But when Kate texts Maggie to thank her for the day, the girl completely shifts Kate's perspective on the situation.
"thank you for letting me spend today with you, I never get invited to birthdays" she confesses.
Kate's heart tightens. It's so unfair that there's so many nerdy kids like them out there who think they're all alone and unlovable, when really all they would need is to meet one another to realize friendship isn't some mystical thing that will always be out of reach.
Once again, Summer comes, but this time, Kate takes matters into her own hands and sneaks off to buy a cheap prepaid SIM card when she arrives in Mexico. Thankfully, Snapchat and Facebook don't count towards her data use here, so she takes advantage of it to spam Cy with as many pics as she can and trades fic recs with Maggie during the entire break. Long gone are her days of boredom- she even occasionally lets herself get convinced by her dad to go on hikes with her siblings, when they're not too busy playing soccer amongst themselves. It's so weird that she doesn't find her family as insufferable as she used to. Did they get more tolerable, or has she simply gotten better at handling her emotions in a productive way? Who knows… Certainly not her!
When Kate sees there's only one Forester on her schedule for her Senior Year, she tenses up, and then instantly relaxes the moment she sees it's lined up with Math. Yes. f*ck yes. This is the best possible combination! Taking over Ms. Forester for Kate this year is Mr. Nicholson, a guy in his late thirties who seems super preppy yet chill at the same time. He's strict enough that his classes rarely get too loud, and cool enough that Kate can safely doze off when she's feeling super tired without fearing being put on the spot and mocked for it.
"I asked to be put in charge of Senior AP classes specifically this year, but I wasn't sure if they were gonna listen." Cy confesses with a devious smile after his first class with Kate, like he's done something nasty and forbidden.
"Isn't it rough, switching things up every year?" Kate asks.
"Math is Math, my dear. Once you understand the logic of how things work, everything is easy." Cy reassures her.
"...Said the nerd prodigy."
He smiles.
"I did get you here, didn't I?" he says, and Kate can't deny how incredible he is at his job. He somehow enabled a dumbass like her to go from mediocre to 'getting extra credits for college'. It's kinda wild.
Kate's almost scared she's going to turn out like him, but then again, Cy makes the nerd lifestyle look pretty cool.
"I want to f*cking DIE." Kate cries to Cy, and she's barely being dramatic.
"What's going on?" Cy asks, curious.
Kate shakes her head in despair.
"One of my billion distant aunts died and my parents are forcing me to go to her funeral on Monday. The very same day I'm supposed to go to an Imagine Dragons concert! I told them how much I'd saved up to buy that f*cking ticket, how long I'd been looking forward to it, but they won't budge. This is the f*cking worst." she laments. Cy gently pats her on the back.
"Are they actually good or just popular?"
"Suuuper good and crazy popular. I've been dreaming of going to one of their concerts for f*cking eveeeerrrr. And like, I'm an introvert, I don't even like concerts! But I just have to see them, I love them so much…"
Cy smiles at her empathically and pulls out his phone to look up a few things.
"...Saint-Paul, right?" Cy asks to check.
"Mh-hm." Kate mutters, dejected.
"Well I understand the frustration, that's basically next door. There's another one on Saturday though… Buuut it's in Cincinnati."
"So close yet so far away at the same time…"
"Well, what if you went?"
Kate blinks.
"Uh, one, I'm broke, buying tickets last minute costs a goddamn fortune. Two, it's like a 10 hour drive and there's no way my parents are gonna drive me there. Three… I got hockey on Saturdays now!"
Cy smirks.
"Don't tell me you've never skipped practice."
Double blink.
"Are you suggesting…?"
"I'd like to help you."
"...Cy, nevermind me skipping practice, you certainly can't miss a whole day!" Kate realizes- she remembers Cy telling her he works on Saturdays and only takes real breaks on Sundays.
"Why not, I never let loose? I most definitely can take a day off 'for my own health' and take you to Cincinnati."
"But… Everything else too, are you sure-" Kate hesitates.
"Going to that concert is real important to you, isn't it?" Cy insists.
She sighs.
"Yeah, I've been dreaming about it for years…"
"Then I'll get you there, don't worry about the details."
Kate sniffles. This would be the nicest thing anyone has ever done for her. She has a hard time allowing herself to believe in it, but also Cy has never promised something to her and bailed out before, and it doesn't look like he intends on starting that now. Overcome with gratitude, she lunges at him and hugs him as tight as he can.
"Thank you so much."
"Anything for my favorite student."
They leave early in the morning, just to be safe. The weather's chilly, and yet Kate doesn't feel cold at all. Her whole body is so warm just from seeing Cy waiting for her on the corner of her street, just like he promised.
"I'm parked just over there, are you ready?" he asks with a big smile, and Kate is proud to know she can outsmile him, today. She hasn't been this happy in so long.
"Let's go."
The drive is gonna be long, so Kate immediately starts rummaging through Cy's stuff.
"Can I look into your glove compartment?" she asks.
Cy stops to think for a few seconds, like he's not sure what's in there.
"Uuuh… Yeah, sure." he finally says.
So Kate looks, and among a pack of tissues, another of chewing gum, mints, and a dog-shaped keychain, she finds a CD binder with almost all of its pages filled.
"Oh my God- am I finally getting to know your secret, forbidden music tastes?" she asks excitedly.
"Well, mine and/or my wife's. But yeah, sure, judge us." Cy says with a shrug.
Kate hums joyfully as she flips through the binder.
"Let's see… Queen, Prince, Bob Dylan, The Strokes, Bon Jovi, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones- oooh, you got a lot of Michael Jackson in there- Iron Maiden? And right next to ABBA??"
"The duality of marriage."
Kate snickers.
"Which of you two listens to Kanye West?" she asks amusedly as she finds at least half of his discography in there.
"Hm, mostly Lynn."
"That's f*cking hilarious, man."
"Why?"
"I dunno, doesn't seem like the type."
"She absolutely is the type, you just don't know her." Cy chuckles.
Kate has gone through ⅔ of the binder when something foreign catches her eye.
"...Huh, The Animals. Never heard of those guys." she mutters.
Cy perks up.
"You don't know The Animals?"
"I mean, this CD says those songs came out in… '64 and '65? Yeesh. It's not my fault you're old as balls, I'm young, man."
"I wasn't born then either! Oh, Katey, you have to listen to this one, it's a classic." Cy insists.
"...Alright, then. The Animals, comin' right up." Kate chippers as she pops The Best of The Animals into the car's CD player.
The second she hears that guitar riff, Kate's hit with a massive wave of nostalgia, but it's only after the singer finishes the first verse that it really hits her.
"I've heard this before." she realizes. "Where?"
"The radio?" Cy suggests with a shrug.
"No, I listen to music on Youtube and discover new artists through Tumblr, Cy, how-" Kate mutters as she shakes her head, and then she remembers.
"...What is it?"
Kate snickers and hides her face in embarrassment.
"Supernatural. I heard it in an episode of Supernatural." she shamefully confesses.
Cy laughs heartily.
"Of course you'd know it through one of your little shows." he says with a big smile on his face. Kate can't be mad at him for laughing, she finds it funny too.
"You'll have to watch some of my 'little shows' one of these days, though." she notes.
"Ah… When I find the time, out of my very busy schedule."
"Says the guy who took a day off to go to an Imagine Dragons concert when he doesn't even know the band."
"Says the girl who's very happy and grateful she's getting a free ride to a concert of her favorite band."
"...Alright."
They arrive in Cincinnati in the middle of the afternoon, way ahead of schedule.
"sh*t, this looks cool. I might have to take back what I said about Ohio." Kate mutters, looking at the skyline through her window. She finds the city slightly more scenic-looking than Minneapolis.
"Don't." Cy sneers. "Believe me, it's not worth it."
"Why not?" Kate asks.
"Crime, mostly. Also, Ohio." Cy says. Kate laughs.
"Is there nothing here you can't find at home?" she asks, and Cy seems to actually stop to try and think of a good answer for it.
"...My parents, I guess." he finally says.
"Wait, they live here?" Kate yelps.
"Yeah, right next to Eden Park. Pretty sure that's only a couple of miles away from the concert venue, actually." Cy mutters absent-mindedly.
There's a beat.
Cy blinks.
"...Hm. I think I might pay them a quick visit, if you don't mind?" he suggests. Kate's heart jumps out of her chest.
"My God, I'm finally meeting your parents!" she jokes.
Cy smirks.
"Yeah, after all this time, I guess this was the most obvious next step in our relationship." he says, chuckling. "No, but seriously, I promised my mother I'd come by and say hi some time soon, this is as good an opportunity as it gets."
Kate smiles. She's nervous, but she also finds this super cute.
"I'm pretty sure we have way more than enough time for it, go ahead, man."
Kate doesn't know what she expected, but it wasn't that. The Foresters' home is huge and old, the kind of house one might be tempted to call a manor. But beyond the house itself, there's also the park, the scenery, the surrounding buildings- Kate may have come to this city for the first time but she's smart enough to recognize a rich people neighborhood when she sees one. Cy seems almost nervous when he rings the doorbell after fixing his hair. Kate's glad she dressed a little more adult today.
The door opens to an old Asian woman with short salt & pepper hair wearing a very elegant green jumpsuit and fluffy white slippers. She's a bit curvy and her powdered face seems kind. She gasps when she sees Cy.
"Oh, Cyrus, you should've told me you were visiting!" the old woman says, her face beaming with love and affection as she leans in to hug her son tightly. Cy hugs her back.
"Don't worry, Ma, I'm just passing through. I wanted to at least say hi!" he reassures her with a big smile on his face.
"Well, now you have." she says before noticing Kate. "And who's your friend here?"
"This young woman is going to a concert and I'm her chauffeur for the day." Cy chimes in before Kate has the chance to respond.
The old woman quirks an eyebrow and tilts her head as she gives her son a slightly confused smile.
"...Oh, that's what all those billboards were for, huh. Well, come on in!" she chirps.
Hesitantly, Kate follows Cy as he steps into the intimidating house.
The inside is, weirdly enough, somehow unsurprising. It's not the preconceived idea Kate has of what a rich person's home looks like, but everything looks fitting. The gorgeous, carefully picked tiles in the entrance and the kitchen, the glossy wooden floor of the living room, the fancy looking couches, the TV, the library, and what seems to be a collection of African artifacts ("my dad's" Cy whispers as he catches her staring) that look like they'd belong in a museum. Huh.
While Cy seems to be carefully examining the place to see what changed since he last came, Kate feels almost ashamed to be studying her surroundings like this, like she's intruding on someone's privacy. But Cy's mom doesn't seem to mind- she's off boiling tea in the kitchen.
"You redid the kitchen. Again." Cy points out amusedly. His mother giggles.
"I was feeling like we needed to brighten this place up a little, you know? But your father's always in his little man cave, it took him 2 weeks to realize anything had changed."
"Typical."
"You take after him, you know." the old woman says half mockingly with a big affectionate smile on her face as her son rolls his eyes.
"There is no way you can put all the blame on him, you're both loners. I get more social interactions in a week than you two do in a year." he talks back.
Mrs. Forester just laughs as she hands her son a cup of tea.
"Drink up. It's good for you. To get rid of toxins, you know?" she says, triggering yet another eyeroll in Cy. Not caring one bit, she brings another cup to Kate.
"Thank you Ma'am." Kate says very softly, intimidated by how fancy the cup looks.
"You're very welcome." the old woman says brightly, before turning to Cy.
"Hm?" he mutters, sipping his tea.
"I'm gonna get your father." his mother confesses.
"No you aren't." Cy says with a shake of his head.
"Yes I am." Mrs. Forester insists. "You two haven't talked in ages."
As she walks away to apparently climb some very tall stairs, Cy tells Kate to put down the tea with a simple head gesture and points to a corridor.
"Wanna see my old room?" he proposes, and Kate is beyond excited.
"Of course!" she says, at first running to the corridor then slowing down when she remembers she's not even wearing slippers or anything. Cy snickers as he sees her glide a little on the very meticulously waxed wooden floor.
"Welcome to my crib." Cy says with a smirk as he opens the door to his room before catching himself. "...Please don't tell me that's too outdated a reference, or I'll die."
Kate snickers.
"It's not, but you're still super old." she says, cautiously walking into Cy's childhood room.
"Damn it." he grumbles sarcastically, looking at the room from the outside.
There's a lot of information for Kate to take in- first of all, this is probably the busiest she's ever seen a teen room look while still being clean before. The bed is big, comfortable looking, and very neatly made. On the royal blue walls are pinned many posters of planes, rocketships and spaceships. Some are highly realistic renditions of existing crafts, others are pure fantasy. On his shelves are organized a slew of books, toy figurines, cassettes, CDs, and what seems like quite a few sketchbooks.
Kate spots on one of the bottom shelves a pile of old consoles she recognizes from binging retro gaming Youtube videos when she was in the 7th grade- a NES, a Genesis, an SNES and an Atari. They seem to be in really good condition, they're probably worth a lot today.
"You could make a killing on Ebay with these." she tells Cy. But he doesn't seem to react.
When she turns around, she can see through the thin opening of the almost-closed door Cy facing away, looking off into the distance. It's only when she hears the sound of an unfamiliar step pattern getting closer that Kate realizes what he's being distracted by, so she quietly walks back to the door and peeks.
The pale old man approaching Cy is just as freakishly tall but extremely wiry. His wavy hair is pure white, as is the bushy beard that's covering half of his face, and he wears glasses too. Kate thinks he kinda looks like a skinny Santa.
"Cyrus."
"Dad."
There's a weird unspoken tension there.
"I hear you came with a friend." the old man says, coldly.
"I did. Just doing a favor there, you know." Cy replies very casually.
"Nothing more?"
"Nope."
"You didn't come here with any other intentions?" Cy's father insists.
"Absolutely not."
"You're not using this as an excuse to…"
Cy groans.
"I don't need excuses for anything. I'm helping a friend out and I'm visiting my terribly lonely parents. I'm being a good son!"
"And how about a good husband?"
"Dad."
Kate shudders. Does Cy's dad know?
"Don't you think I've forgotten the conversation we had last time. You're lucky I didn't tell your mother."
"Why are you being such a pain about it? Those are private matters. Between me and my wife. So not only are you not gonna tell Ma about it, but you're also not gonna get on my case every time I come over, because that's going to get tiring very fast and I'd like to keep associating this home with happy memories."
Cy's father shakes his head and sighs.
"...It's hard, you know. Doing your best, and still being disappointed." he mutters as he massages his temples. Cy raises his eyebrows, unimpressed.
"There are worse disappointments to have, Dad. I'd appreciate it if you focused on the positive for once. Even Ma can do it!"
"This isn't about the Boeing thing."
"But it is. At least a little! Come on, you're gonna have to forgive me one day. And her too."
"We're not…"
"I know contempt when I see it, I'm not an idiot." Cy groans before pausing. "...You know it's not her fault, right?" he adds.
"Oh, I know."
"But you don't believe it."
"No."
"Well, stop getting on my f*cking case about her if you're still so upset."
"I- it's a matter of principle!"
"Then let her decide that for herself, will you? In the meantime, I'll keep on leading a happy life with fulfilling activities and lovely memories."
Cy's father rolls his eyes.
"Fine." he groans. "But don't expect me to defend you when sh*t hits the fan, and I know it will."
"Good enough." Cy says with a shrug before heading towards the door. sh*t, sh*t!
Kate doesn't have the time to think about what this cryptic ass conversation meant exactly and immediately turns around and pretends she's looking at Cy's posters again. A few seconds later, she hears the door open then close in a quiet click behind her.
"Enjoying the decor?" Cy asks casually as if he didn't just have what seems like a pretty serious argument with his dad.
"Yeah, glad to see you weren't lying- you have always been a huge nerd."
Cy laughs.
"Come on, let's get out of here."
They politely say goodbye before heading out of the house and, while Kate is pretending to check out her phone in the car, Cy gives his mom another big hug and a kiss, which is absolutely f*cking adorable. She looks so tiny next to her son.
"You come back whenever you want, honey." she says softly. "And you can tell Evelynn she's welcome to stay too."
"Maybe next Christmas?" Cy suggests with a shrug.
The old woman smiles and gets on her tiptoes to ruffle his hair.
"That's my boy." she says lovingly.
"...How much of that did you hear?" Cy asks softly as he gets into the car.
"What, you being adorable with your mom?" Kate laughs.
"Before that." Cy specifies, and Kate shudders.
"Not much." she lies. She doesn't really get what Cy and his dad were talking about but it seems the old man is slightly resentful towards both his son and his daughter-in-law. "...Something about Boeing?"
Cy smirks.
"Yeah, he's still a little bitter about my career change. It's been over 15 years, you'd think he would've gotten over it by now!" he says with a big smile and a tinge of annoyance in his voice.
"And your wife...?" Kate timidly probes.
Cy pops a square of chewing gum into his mouth.
"You want one?" he asks, shaking the pack in Kate's direction. She nods, silently takes a square and starts chewing.
"My parents are persuaded that Lynn is to blame for me giving up on engineering. And I mean… yes, I did take her into account when I decided to become a teacher. I wanted to be able to spend more time with her, to work closer to home, but… Honestly, the career change was mostly just for me- I really wanted to become a teacher." Cy explains softly. Kate frowns.
"...Wait, do your parents consider being a teacher like some kind of disgrace or something?" she asks, incredulous.
"Eh, kiiiinda? I think it's mostly that they were really proud of what I did as an engineer, and teaching is just… not as impressive to them." Cy mutters absent-mindedly.
Kate thinks her parents would be proud of her for simply getting a job. It's weird to think anyone would be bummed out by having their child become a teacher. She always was under the impression it was a pretty noble position to pick, but maybe that's just her parents' opinion.
"Well, I know how impressive you are as a teacher." Kate says proudly. "Just saying. You know, just in case you need reminding."
Cy smiles like a fox.
"I don't need it, but it's greatly appreciated. Now, you wanna go to your concert or what?"
It's a night for the ages, Kate's sure of it. She will never forget this.
If she's slightly worried about things turning sour because she has an argument with Cy from the get-go– he insists she wear earplugs to protect her hearing during the concert, which is dumb because the whole point of going to a concert is being able to hear really loud music– her fears are instantly soothed the minute she steps into the concert hall. This building is so huge, she's never seen so many people gathered in one place before. The neon lights activate some secret hidden part of her brain and release a flow of endorphins in her system when the music starts playing. Thankfully, Cy was right to force her to wear the earplugs- out of curiosity during the concert, she removes one and it feels like her eardrums are gonna be blasted off, so she immediately puts it back in. Imagine Dragons has always been loud music, but this is a whole new kind of loud for Kate. It f*cks hard, though. The soundwaves rock her to her very core. She loves this music for a good reason- it's big, loud and angsty, just like her. But it also feels powerful. Dan Reynolds is speaking to her soul, and not many people can really do that.
Kate's so entranced by the music, she almost forgets Cy is there with her for a moment, but when she turns to look at him, she's reminded of why she likes him so much. Instead of looking at the stage, he's staring at her with a big affectionate smile on his face. He's taking in her joy, drinking it in with his eyes.
"You having fun?" he mouths. Kate nods excitedly.
"This is the best!" she mouths back. Then she perks up.
"Can I take a picture?" she asks Cy, miming taking a picture with an invisible camera. He seems to think about it for a few seconds before nodding.
So Kate takes out her phone and takes a bunch of pics- the stage, of course, the crowd, but also pictures of Cy in those unusual neon lights. He's so clearly out of his element and yet he doesn't look uncomfortable- he's genuinely happy to be here with her. It means the world to Kate. So she ends up taking a few selfies with him as well, before filming the stage for a few seconds. She needs to save this for the future, so she can remember it and savor it even long after it's over.
"Like preserved in amber!" Cy tells her when he sees her replay the video on their way to their hotel.
Kate's euphoric when her back bounces on the bed of their hotel room. She's exhausted and she can tell her body wants rest, but her brain is pumped so full of adrenaline her excitement just won't come down.
"I still can't believe it. This was my first concert!" she giggles with glee.
"Seems like a really good start, then!" Cy says with a bright smile as he takes off his jacket. He seems a little worn too.
"Be honest- did you like the music?" Kate asks.
Cy smirks.
"It's not exactly what I'd instinctively put on whenever I reach for my CDs, but it wasn't bad at all. That man has pipes." he says.
Kate smiles. She never expected him to become a fan in the first place, so there's no disappointment there. She's glad he didn't have to suffer too much for her sake, at the very least.
"Thank you. For everything." she says. "You managed to turn one of my biggest disappointments into something that's totally unforgettable."
Cy's smile is so big it looks like his eyes are closed. Slowly, he walks up to the bed, kneels and gives her a kiss on the lips.
"I'm so happy I could give you that." he says softly before kissing her again, deeper this time. Kate opens her lips to let him in.
Quickly, as his kisses get increasingly sexual, she can feel his breathing pick up, and soon enough he's on the bed too, climbing on top of her, pushing her into the mattress. There's something so comforting to her about feeling his weight on her like this. It feels like he exists to protect her from the evils of this world.
"Do you mind?" he mutters against her lips as he playfully taps on her crotch with his fingers.
"Mh-hm." Kate moans as she shakes her head very slightly, so Cy kisses her again and unbuttons her pants to slide both them and her panties off in one confident gesture. Unsurprisingly, Kate's pretty wet already.
What does surprise her, however, is when Cy detaches his lips from hers and moves to her neck, chest, ribs, belly- only to finally look up at her when she tenses up at the touch of his lips against the top of her pubic mound, as she's learned in Biology class. He's never kissed her in 'panty territory' before, or at least she's never let him.
"Is everything OK?" he asks.
Kate gulps. He's clearly trying to go down on her, which is not something she ever prepared for.
"I… I'm just self-conscious about… you know, down there…" she mutters awkwardly.
"Nothing I haven't seen before." Cy says with a wink. He kisses her in the same place again, still not going any lower.
"...Kate?" he calls after she stays silent for a little too long.
"...After that, do you expect me to-" she asks anxiously.
"I have zero expectations. I just want to make you feel good, I promise." Cy assures.
Kate looks up at the ceiling. She knows Cy wouldn't lie about this, he's never pushed her to do anything before. If he keeps his promise and doesn't ask her to give him a blowj*b, then this will have been worth it. So Kate takes a deep breath and slowly lets it out as she tries to relax her body.
"Okay. You can do it." she finally says, rhythmically giving her thighs a few light slaps, and Cy looks like he was just told the most exciting news in the world.
Not hiding his eagerness one bit, he kisses her mons again before wrapping his hands around her hips and lowering his head between her legs. The feeling of Cy's tongue against her cl*t hits Kate like electricity- it's so foreign, so weird and so intense that she lets out a squeaky yelp, which in turn makes Cy chuckle a little before he opens his mouth again to close it against her intimacy and start sucking.
It's weird… Kate realizes being eaten out feels both extremely uncomfortable yet pleasurable at the same time. The wet slurping noises are a massive turn-off, but the very low, deep moans that come from Cy's chest send delightful chills down her spine. She doesn't like how messy it feels either, but something about getting her cl*t sucked like this activates nerve endings that had, up until now in her life, remained completely unstimulated. She's about to file the event in her brain as a "neutral experience" since the pros and cons seem to balance out pretty evenly, but then Cy does something with his tongue that sets off fireworks in her entire body. Her legs shake uncontrollably and she barely manages to keep herself from squirting ("not in his face, not in his face!" she prays in her head). When her trembling stops, all she can hear is her own labored breathing, as well as Cy quietly chuckling between her legs.
"I'd never seen you do that before." he says with a foxy grin when Kate works up the courage to look down. He looks like a mess- a happy mess.
"I've never felt like this before." Kate shoots back.
"Is that a good or a bad thing?" Cy asks.
Kate takes a moment to collect her thoughts.
"...Good, I think. Weird, but good." she mutters timidly.
Cy smiles then lets out a huge sigh of relief.
"I'm glad." he says as he slowly extracts himself from the bed and walks to the bathroom. "I was worried I'd pushed you too far."
He comes back with a towel and a water bottle. Wordlessly, Kate grabs the bottle and drinks as she lets Cy wipe the slime and sweat off her body.
"It was good." Kate decides. "I'll have to ask you to do it again, just… not right away, you know. I gotta prepare myself psychologically for that kinda stuff."
Cy gives her a wink.
"Gotcha."
Kate smiles and lets herself sink into the mattress again. Thank god, she didn't f*ck this up. Not only did it feel better than she expected, but she didn't make a fool of herself, and she showed Cy she's not a scared kid anymore.
She is almost an adult after all.
Kate's filling in her college applications early, like her mom insisted she should. It's boring but she owes it to herself to be meticulous. When it's time to fill in what she wants to major in, though, she hesitates.
Without even broaching the subject of tuition costs (Kate strongly doubts her parents can afford any of her top picks), she has a hard time even imagining how she's going to lead her student life if she manages to get in the right places. Just a week ago, Cy very pragmatically told her the best majors to get into law school are Political Science, Business and Economics.
"Of course, there's also Philosophy, Psychology and History, but you're more of a science girl, right?" he'd said, and Kate had found herself… a bit ambivalent about that.
Yes, thanks to Cy's help, science-y subjects are where she performs the best, but truth be told, she's way more into humanities. It seems Cy is just… really good at his job- it's hard to not be into science when he's the one telling you about it.
Then she thinks about how well she's been doing in Social Studies, how enriching it's been even though she's not getting any help from Cy in those, and he won't be there for her in college anyway.
Not even thinking one second about the irony of what she's doing, Kate writes in 'History' as her desired Major.
For New Year's Eve, Maggie talks Kate into infiltrating a party they're technically not invited to- the catch? It's at her house: Maggie's older brother Connor is hosting. He's in college now, but since he apparently made a lot of friends out of his grade back when he was at Trinity, many high school students show up which allows Kate to blend in quite easily.
She's sporting what she has now dubbed "the Cy Special", an outfit entirely composed of things Cy has gifted her over the years. A goth black lace top from her 16th birthday, a burgundy velvet skirt from last year's Christmas, cool combat boots he got her on a whim while they were hanging out at a mall in a neighboring city, silver jewelry from her 17th birthday, and fancy makeup she'd been eyeing for a while that Cy got her last week for Christmas.
If wearing one of Cy's gifts always boosts her confidence a little, making an outfit out of just his gifts makes her feel like a f*cking warrior. She could probably bite someone's head off, right now.
"Wow, you look… bold." Maggie says when she sees Kate at the door. "Aren't you a little cold?"
"Nah, I got natural insulation. Like a seal." Kate says, slapping her right thigh like a seal would. Maggie laughs.
"Come on in."
There's so many people, it's hard to tell what the place even looks like- there's Christmas lights and "Happy New Year 2018" decorations everywhere, and also many drinks Kate's not supposed to have.
She remembers begging Cy to let her try alcohol, last year. "If I'm mature enough to have sex, shouldn't I also be able to drink?" she'd told him. He'd appreciated her boldness and relented by pouring her a tiny bit of beer inside a glass, which she immediately hated. "Good." he said. "The less you like that sort of thing, the better. It's why I try not to drink."
But now, she's without Cy's watchful eye over her, and she decides to get some punch. It stings her throat a little, but it actually tastes nice. She figures Cy gave her bitter tasting beer on purpose to try and deter her from drinking- too bad. Because she doesn't recognize anyone she knows from high school, she decides to stick with Maggie, who looks a bit awkward with the way-too-many layers she's wearing right now. She's thin, what does she have to feel self-conscious about? They decide to sit on some stairs and comment on how the guests look for a good 20 minutes before the conversation starts to get boring.
"You done anything cool this year?" Maggie asks to change the subject.
"Oh- as a matter of fact, yes I did!" Kate proudly exclaims. "I went to see Imagine Dragons in concert, and it f*cked."
Maggie quirks an eyebrow.
"Pics or it didn't happen."
Excited to be able to show off for once, Kate doesn't think twice before going through her pics and showing her phone to Maggie so she can look at what she took of the concert. She feels a bit annoyed when Maggie takes the phone into her own hands- she could very well just look at it from Kate's hands. Admiratively, her friend swipes and swipes, goes through each picture with a tinge of jealousy in her eyes, until that emotion is replaced by surprise and she suddenly stops.
"...Wait, is that Mr. Forester?" Maggie mutters.
Kate's blood turns cold. sh*t.
"Gimme that!" she yelps as she finally manages to tear her phone from Maggie's hands.
f*ck, this could be really bad, she has to think fast… So she brings the phone to her face to study the pic more closely and pretends like she just noticed. Thank god, it's one of the first pics where Cy appears, and he's not even in the center. Whew, now that's plausible deniability.
"sh*t, that really is him. He looks like he's having fun!" Kate awkwardly comments. Thank God Maggie didn't swipe far enough to see their selfies.
She squints at Kate suspiciously.
"You think so? He doesn't look like he belongs there at all. Ah, but then again, he would be the type…"
Kate blinks.
"What do you mean?" she asks.
Maggie grimaces.
"Well, don't you think he's kind of a tryhard? The 'how do you do, fellow kids' kinda guy? It's super cringe."
Kate frowns.
"No he's not. He's just got interests, you know?"
"Yeah, but the same as us? That's embarrassing."
"Why would it be embarrassing? Do you think you're cringe?"
"Well, no, cuz I'm 16, but he's like. Super old."
Kate's trying really hard not to get upset but it's just… So hard in those circ*mstances. She doesn't want to raise any suspicions, but also she can't let someone insult Cy, and least of all her only teen friend.
"I think it's mean to make fun of someone for what they like, especially when they're nice like Mr. Forester." she grumbles.
Maggie frowns.
"...Why are you so defensive of him? Do you have a crush on him or something?"
Kate's heart skips a beat.
"I- I just don't like it when people are made fun of."
"We make fun of other people all the time!"
"Well, not him, alright! He-" Kate yelps before remembering she can't let anyone know about their relationship. "...He was a really great teacher to me and he's the reason my grades aren't sh*t anymore."
Maggie rolls her eyes and shrugs.
"Whatever. You're such a teacher's pet." she mutters before walking away.
Kate feels like a pit is growing in her stomach. She didn't like that. She didn't like that at all. Quietly, she sneaks off and locks herself into the bathroom and just… cries.
She thought Maggie was a good friend, but she can't trust someone like that not to make fun of her behind her back. And not only that, but she sees a little bit of herself in Maggie right now, of the way she was before she befriended Cy. She doesn't like being reminded that she too used to feel annoyed at Cy's whole schtick, but how could she even begin to explain to someone the impact this man has had on her?
Fortunately, right as she walks out of the bathroom, rubbing her eyes, a pale, chill looking guy with long brown hair and a cool sleeveless leather jacket notices her and taps her on the shoulder.
"Hey, you okay?" he asks.
Kate turns to look at him. She can see a bit of her reflection in his glasses, it thankfully looks like her makeup didn't get smudged.
"I'm just not feeling great." she says meekly.
The stranger eyes the back door and pats the back pockets of his jeans.
"How about we take a breath of fresh air, you and I?" he proposes. Kate nods vigorously.
When they step out, Kate's shocked by how cold it is and immediately gets goosebumps. She definitely got used to how warm the house was too quickly. She tries to hide her discomfort by looking away and blowing little clouds of condensation into the air.
"I'm Jonah. You?" the guy says.
"Kate." Kate mutters.
"Too many people inside for you, huh?" he guesses as he pulls a little metal box and a lighter out of his pockets.
"You could say that." Kate mutters. "I just had an argument with a friend."
Jonah sucks air through his teeth in response.
"Ah, that sucks. Holiday arguments are the worst. Don't worry, though, I'm sure things will get better quickly enough."
"I don't know, I'm afraid maybe it's more serious than just a little disagreement."
Jonah stares at her for a second, then he closes his eyes and shrugs.
"That happens too. Hey, do you smoke?" he asks.
"Sometimes." Kate lies. The only thing she's ever smoked in her life was sausage, when cooking with her mother.
"Right on." Jonah says with a nod, and he brings a weird cigarette up to her lips and lights it.
Not wanting to look like a loser, Kate inhales and tries to keep the smoke in, but sh*t, it stings and it burns and it smells bad and- she starts coughing loudly. sh*t. Jonah laughs.
"Not used to weed, huh? It's OK, everyone looks a little dumb when they start." he reassures her with a smile and a pat on her back.
"OH, so this isn't tobacco. That explains things." Kate thinks to herself. It feels weird.
"You can keep it, it's on the house." Jonah says with a smirk, lighting his own blunt. "You look like you need it."
"Thanks." Kate says, inhaling again and coughing slightly less this time. She's starting to feel really relaxed, if a little dizzy.
"So, what do you do, Miss Kate?"
"Uh… I'm a Senior. There isn't much to me, honestly, I'm just trying to go to a good college so I can get into law school." she says. Jonah laughs.
"Ah, then maybe don't smoke too much, this'll fry your brain if you do it all the time. But hey, you've got plans! That sounds nice."
"What about you?"
"I do programming. I'm self-taught- not to brag, but I'm really good, although I'm starting to think that's not gonna be enough."
Kate tilts her head as she takes another hit.
"Employers, they, uuuh- they really like it when you have a diploma from a fancy university. I don't personally think I need it to do my job, but it takes a lot of convincing, y'know. I'm almost tempted to go to college just to get that dumb stamp of approval." Jonah explains.
"Well that sucks." Kate says with a frown. Jonah laughs.
"Yeah, yeah… But hey, I don't think self-taught lawyers are a thing, so you're gonna have to go no matter what."
"I don't know." Kate mutters. "I'm not even sure my parents can afford it."
Jonah slaps her on the back again.
"Don't worry, kiddo, things always work themselves out, one way or another."
Kate smirks. She thinks it's funny that a guy who's probably not that much older than her is calling her 'kiddo', but it feels nice to be comforted by a kind stranger like that.
As they come back inside after they're done smoking, Jonah turns to Kate.
"By the way, do you like boys?" he asks.
Kate's kinda taken aback by that question. Is he trying to flirt or is he just asking?
"...Or maybe you prefer girls?" Jonah wonders.
"Boys! I like boys. At least, I think so." Kate mutters embarrassedly.
"Don't we all." Jonah says with a smirk. "Welp, I know pretty much everyone here, so if you crush on anyone, just ask me, I'll get you their number."
Kate blinks. Whoever Jonah is to these people, she's certain of one thing. He's the ultimate bro. As she looks around to try and analyze the crowd, she realizes no one really catches her eye. Even the older-looking guys are still clearly in her age range, and they all look so immature to her. She's interested in men, not boys.
"That's a very generous offer, but I think I'm gonna pass up on it and head out after I get another drink. I'm taken anyway." she confesses.
Jonah's eyebrows jump in surprise, but he's still smiling. Quickly, he grabs a pen and scribbles something really quick on a piece of paper. He seems delighted to know Kate isn't totally alone.
"Congrats on the boyfriend, then. He should come hang out with us, next time." he says, and he slips her the piece of paper before heading upstairs, presumably to talk to other people.
As Kate walks home with what looks suspiciously like a whiskey-cola in her hand, she reads the little paper Jonah gave her with the other. It's a phone number, accompanied by the mention "pals?", which Kate thinks is really sweet. She's glad this wasn't a waste of time. She comes home just in time for the New Year countdown and, as she removes her makeup, she gets a text from Cy.
"To a wonderful new year with you in it."
Kate's tired that day, not only because of her general tendency to go to bed increasingly late, but also because she apparently got a response from one of the colleges she applied to, this morning, and she hasn't had the chance to open it yet. She's like on autopilot, just going through the motions, waiting for the day to end and for her to meet up with Cy and open the letter. But fate has other plans and, as she steps into the cafeteria, a familiar voice suddenly stands out among the hundreds that are currently talking and quickly, Kate finds its origin in Cy, who is standing against the wall next to his wife and talking with her in public, something Kate hasn't really observed before. Snapped out of her sleepy trance, she tries to get closer without making it too obvious she's eavesdropping.
“...But see, I have to insist.” Ms. Forester says rather quietly. The way she's hissing makes it so in spite of the ambient noise, it's not too hard to pick up on what she's saying when you're not standing too far away from her.
“Well, I’m not in a good mood today.” Cy grumbles, crossing his arms.
“Really? Wǒ tīng shuō nǐ hé Zhēnnī wán dé hěn kāi xīn.”
For a second, Kate thinks she might’ve misheard because she didn’t understand a word of that sentence, before she realizes that was probably Chinese. Meanwhile, Cy is rolling his eyes. Whatever the hell his wife just said, he’s not having any of it.
“Nǐ zhī shì jī dù ér yǐ.” he retorts with a jaded look on his face. Kate's surprised to hear those sounds come out of his mouth, she didn't know he spoke it too.
“I’m being normal. Tā xū yào bāng zhù, ér bù shì xū yào nǐ.”
“And what makes you think that?”
“I have eyes and a brain.”
“Suàn le.” Cy grumbles as he dismisses her with the wave of his hand.
“Nǐ bì xū zǔ zhǐ zhè yī qiē, I’m serious.” Ms. Forester insists. “Tā hěn cuì ruò.”
“Bié tí le… Hǎo bā, wǒ xiān tuì hòu yī diǎn!”
“I need more than that.”
“Nǐ haí yào wǒ shuō shén me ā? Leave it.” Cy groans.
Ms. Forester lets out an exasperated sigh.
“This one time, make a real effort. Just for me, please. I promise I have good reasons.”
“You always have good reasons.”
“Now even moreso.”
Cy rolls his eyes again and cracks his knuckles, then his neck. He turns to look at his wife again, and they stare into each other’s eyes in silence for a bit.
“...I’ll see what I can do.” Cy finally mutters.
“Thank you.” Ms. Forester says softly before walking away.
For a moment, Cy seems like he's made of stone, aimlessly looking into the distance, but then, suddenly, like he's got superhuman sensors or something, he turns his head and makes direct eye contact with Kate.
"Anderson!" he says as his face immediately lights up.
"Hey." Kate says, waving at him.
"Eavesdropping, eh? That's a bad habit you have." he whispers into her ear as he walks by her. Kate decides to follow him.
"I didn't understand a word, to be honest." she admits as Cy steps out of the cafeteria.
"That's the goal." he says without slowing down.
"You two reminded me of my parents for a sec." Kate adds, and suddenly Cy stops walking and turns around to look at her, an eyebrow quirked and an intrigued smile on his face.
"What?"
"My parents, they- they speak in a mix of Spanish and English at home, it's funny. You two are kind of the same."
Cy laughs through his nose.
"We do that sometimes, yeah." he mutters before starting to walk away again. He doesn't seem to mind Kate following him.
"What language was that?" she inquires. "Chinese?"
"Mandarin." Cy corrects. "Sometimes we use Cantonese, but I don't like it so much."
"Why?" Kate asks.
Cy stops in front of his office.
"I'm not as smart in Cantonese." he says as he unlocks the door.
When he closes the door behind her, Cy seems nervous, an emotion that Kate usually doesn't associate him with.
"Is everything OK? I thought I was the stressed out one." Kate prods.
Cy chuckles awkwardly.
"I may have overstepped some boundaries, and I'm afraid of how you're gonna react."
"...Cy."
"Please don't be mad…?" he asks tentatively as he goes to fetch multiple envelopes from his desk.
Kate instantly recognizes the emblems of some of the state's most prestigious universities.
"...No, you did not." Kate says as she shakes her head in disbelief.
"I applied for you. Added my recommendation letters."
"Cy!"
"Everything is legit! I didn't lie anywhere on the forms, I used your real SAT scores, and my appreciation of your efforts as a teacher is genuine. Come on, Kate, you only applied to the cheaper colleges, admit it."
She sighs.
"I did. My parents would never be able to afford these." she mutters, mindlessly flipping through the envelopes Cy gave her.
"Well, I also applied for scholarships in your name. Still waiting for a response on those, but I have good reasons to believe you'll get at least one of them. I think you have a real chance, you know."
"...Did I actually get into any of these?" Kate mutters as she uses the college letters like a fan.
"Ah, I think Saint Thomas rejected you," Cy specifies, "But the rest are congratulation letters."
Kate has the sneaking suspicion her grades and track record aren't anywhere near good enough to justify that much success- if she really did get in, it's all thanks to Cy's recommendations.
"You shouldn't have, Cy. It's not fair to the other candidates."
"Since when do you care about other people?"
"Since you taught me the value of hard work, Mr. Forester."
Cy lets out a long sigh.
"...Come over here." he says, spreading his arms out. "Come on."
Kate leans in and accepts the hug.
"I have never seen, and I mean never seen, a student like you grow so fast and so decisively. You're such a hard worker, Kate, and you don't even know it." Cy says softly as he squeezes her into his warm embrace.
"I don't feel legitimate."
"Do you know how many students have tried to bribe me into giving them better grades? More than I can count. And I always refuse, because that's not what teaching and learning are about. I respect you too much to do anything that would misrepresent how talented and hard-working you are."
Kate sniffles. This might be huge.
"I got a letter from one of the colleges I applied to, today." she finally tells him. "Haven't opened it yet, I wanted to do it with you."
Cy nods as he pets her hair.
"Do you want to open it?" he asks. Kate didn't even know that was something that was up in the air.
She thinks about it.
If she opens it and it's a rejection, it means Cy's efforts to get her into a good college are the only reason for her success. She swallows.
"...Nah, I trust you." she says. "Go big or go home, right?"
Cy smiles.
"I like your ambition."
Like all the biggest disasters, it starts out small and quiet. Kate shows up to Math class this morning, and instead of her beloved Math Guy, she gets Mr. Vellman, a decrepit old man whose classes are so widely hated throughout the school that even students who have never had him know he sucks ass. He's ugly, old, smelly, and worst of all, he's boring, which is the absolute worst possible thing one could ever be as a teacher. She immediately texts Cy via Snapchat to complain about the situation, and Cy explains that Vellman's students are so far behind right now that the school is making them swap all their classes for the rest of the year. And like, yay, good for Vellman's students, equality and all, but also… this is so f*cking unfair to Kate. She's being robbed of her last months with Cy.
And the terrible news don't stop there.
As a nerd who grew up on Fullmetal Alchemist, Kate is one of many teens who love to fixate on the Seven Deadly Sins, and for the longest time, the sin she probably would have assigned to Cy was Lust. That day, she changes it to Pride.
As she keeps bantering with him on Snapchat to cope with the galactical level of nothingness she's being subjected to by Vellman's monotonous voice, the topic of Cy's knowledge of modern technology and social media comes up, and when Kate taunts him a little about him not knowing his way around smartphones and apps, he brags about all the different messenger apps he uses, and something inside Kate's brain just clicks.
Why would Cy, who she knows doesn't actually have that many close friends, use so many messenger apps? What would be the need?
It's a shot in the dark- maybe she's just being paranoid after all- but she has to try it. She has to ask.
Shakily, behind a Math textbook, she types in then sends-
im not the only one, am i
One thing Kate has always admired about Cy is his honesty. In the now-almost 4 years they've known each other, she doesn't think she's ever caught him lying to her even once. Sure, sometimes he dodges uncomfortable questions, but he never outright lies, because, Kate has come to learn, he really values honesty.
So Cy's response hits her like a truck.
No, you're not.
Kate blinks. He just… said that to her, huh.
"YOU f*ckING LYING PIECE OF sh*t" she types, then erases.
"WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME" she types and erases again.
"I LOVED YOU" she almost sends, but ends up deleting as well.
She then remembers what Cy taught her about being in control of your emotions, so she takes a deep breath and types in a new message.
well, sh*t
and here i thought i was special
Then, a few seconds later, Cy's Pride causes him to make another mistake.
To be fair, you *are* my favorite student.
Kate swallows. She could interpret this as "You're my favorite student, which makes you special among those I f*ck", or "You being my favorite student makes you special" in general, but there's another, slightly more uncharitable interpretation she could make of that, and she's willing to bet Cy will just admit to it because he's so confident in their relationship he thinks she'll just take it.
dude
what
hang on so it's other STUDENTS you're seeing
duuuuuuuude
Just consider it another form of workplace romance.
…And there it is. Holy sh*t.
workplace romance would be like f*cking another teacher
or the janitor???
duuuuude
ur like actually a total pedooooo
Technically, in my case, it's Ephebophilia.
Kate blinks. Is he f*cking with her?
lmao cy u are not serious with me rn
u sound like an anime fan noooooooooooo
like seriously whenever u have to say that TECHNICALLY ur not a pedophile thats not great
uh quick litmus test
whats ur opinion on goblin slayer
I don't know what that is.
alright this is still salvageable
This is all so unserious that Kate ends the conversation with banter, as always. She prays this is just a f*cked up prank Cy's pulling on her. But she also knows in her heart of hearts it just isn't, especially after Cy insists they see each other after class.
As she zones out for the rest of the morning, Kate comes to the slow and painful realization of what kind of man Cy is, and it's infuriating because not once has he actually lied about any of it. Three key points stand out.
One- he's a cheater. He cheated on his wife (who he supposedly loves!!!) with Kate without a second thought, so of course he has no scruples doing it with God knows how many other women too.
Two- he's into teenage girls. Again, he fell for Kate, so why wouldn't he also be attracted to other teenagers?
Three- he knows exactly what he's doing. Cy has always seemed so confident, so unbothered by the taboo aspect of their relationship, so much so that he hasn't ever expressed any kind of guilt or self-consciousness about dating someone as young as her.
All three points are extremely obvious and have been for a while, but Kate realizes she didn't see them as negative until now because she was under the impression she was special to Cy, and she just… isn't. Those aren't exceptions he's making for her, they're exceptions he makes for himself, every day.
Suddenly the way Cy treats students during class feels different too, in retrospect. Did he give extra attention to other girls or are her memories rewriting themselves just to fit this new perception she has of him? Kate suddenly decides to block it all out and to pause her brain. She doesn't want to draw any definitive conclusions before she actually talks about this with him. Only then will she know what's going on.
It thankfully doesn't take the whole day for Kate to see Cy again- as if he felt her distress, when she's ready to go find a table to sit at in the cafeteria-
"Kate Anderson!" Cy's voice cuts through the hubbub to find her.
She turns around, immediately locks eyes with him, and knowing she'll follow him to his office without needing to say a thing, he simply pivots on his heels and walks away.
"I thought you meant after after class, not at lunch break." Kate mutters as she fiddles with the strap of her messenger bag and speeds up to keep up with Cy's pace. He's never in such a hurry, which is note-worthy.
"So did I, but then I thought it'd be nice to eat lunch together, if you don't mind." he says in that soft voice he uses when he's feeling cuddly, and Kate forgets she's mad at him for a bit.
"Your wife must be so pissed off." she says with a mischievous smile.
Cy chuckles.
"She's only mildly annoyed, but I am ditching her for you today, yes." he confesses, sounding both amused and very fond of her.
Kate can't repress the urge to pump her fist in the air to celebrate this minor, now-ever-more-insignificant-than-before win against Evelynn Forester in the battle for her husband's heart.
As soon as she gets into Cy's office, Kate throws herself onto his old couch and sinks into it. She needs that comfort.
"You wanna talk about this morning, huh?" she says as nonchalantly as she can after Cy locks the door. She doesn't want to set off any alarm bells.
"Sharp as ever." Cy says with a big smile that doesn't seem entirely authentic, and instantly, Kate knows this is the kind of conversation that would trigger an auto-save, were she playing a video game.
"So you were serious. Okay." she grumbles as she bites into the chicken sandwich she brought for lunch to give herself countenance.
There's a beat.
"Are you disappointed?" Cy asks, and Kate just keeps on chewing. "It's okay to be," he adds.
Kate swallows.
"...I mean, I feel dumb just saying this, but I thought I was special." she mutters, utterly failing to hide her disappointment. So Cy drags his office chair over to sit right in front of her.
"You were special- and you still are," he says very softly, the way a parent does when you've just done something you think is awful and they want you to know they still love you.
"I don't let just anyone have the keys to my office." he adds. "I don't let just anyone see the planes I've designed. I don't take days off to drive anyone else to a concert they really wanted to attend. And I can't think of any other student I've had the luck of teaching four years in a row."
Kate looks at her shoes. It's painful how much those things meant to her. For a moment, the tiny little demon that lives inside her head tells her he does that with every girl, but that's just… not true, and it's easy to see when she thinks about it- Cy spends so much time with her on a near-daily basis, there is no way he physically has the time to give other girls even a fraction of the attention he gives her. Cy may be a cheating bastard, but he wasn't lying when he said Kate was special. Maybe she really is his favorite.
"You really mean that?" she asks hesitantly.
"Cross my heart." Cy says softly, and he raises his hand like he's swearing on the Bible, which is deeply funny because as far as Kate knows, they're both atheists.
Kate wipes her mouth and tries to refocus.
"But once I turn 18 and go off to college, you're totally gonna lose interest in me, aren't you?" she insists, incapable of keeping her insecurities to herself.
"I have a… preference for girls your age, not a fetish. Trust me, I'm gonna want to stay in touch. And sex aside- I like being a mentor and a friend to you. That's never gonna go away." Cy explains earnestly.
What Kate's favorite teacher and boyfriend just admitted to is kind of f*cking insane, to be honest. But what's even more insane is… Kate… can't really manage to get actually mad at him?
Like… this is gross. Real f*cking gross. And honestly, at least a little manipulative. Maybe Cy never outright told her lies point blank, but there is such a thing as lying by omission, and Kate is now retrospectively noticing tons of it in her memories. She has to mourn the idea of a relationship she's been fantasizing about for years, and she's only now realizing her fantasy is in a fundamental mismatch with reality. Cy was never going to leave his wife for her, and she was never going to be more than a girlfriend- no, not even a girlfriend. A hookup, a mistress, a concubine at best. But not a girlfriend, and certainly not a wife.
And yet… And yet.
Kate can't stop loving him. She can't just erase the past 3 and a half years from her memory like they didn't mean anything to her, and clearly, given the way Cy's been acting, in spite of everything, those memories obviously mean a lot to him too. He's still smart, handsome and funny, and somehow the sh*ttiness of what he's been doing doesn't cancel that out. It can't erase the hours Cy has spent just chatting with her past midnight, comforting her when she needed it, helping her, teaching her…
So when Cy leans in and puts his face right in front of hers, well. What else can she do other than kiss him? It starts gentle but quickly gets more frantic, more sexual. In spite of everything, this feels good. Really good, in fact, because when Cy starts groping her, grabbing her breasts, her waist, her ass, her thighs, Kate can't help but feel excitement, arousal.
"You can tell, can't you?" Cy says, turning up the heat inside her as he keeps passionately kissing her. "You can tell how much I want you- you really think I could just forget about you?"
Kate moans. It's hard not to believe him when he's making her feel this desired. Maybe too much, actually, because faster than she can even notice, Cy's hand has slipped inside her panties and suddenly Kate is overcome with embarrassment as it's clear she's soaking wet.
"C-Cy, what are you doing?" she yelps, weakly trying to push him off, which doesn't matter much anyway because for once, he won't budge.
"Well, I can't decently let you go to class in that state, right? You're not gonna be able to focus." Cy says matter-of-factly as his fingers curve into a very well-practiced position, one they both know is undeniably the most efficient way to get her off. Moans escape her mouth before she can even feel them rise inside her chest, and her self-consciousness melts away almost immediately. She wants to stay mad with Cy, she wants to be embarrassed about liking him still, but she can't lie to herself about how much she genuinely wants this, so she lets herself get carried away and accepts whatever Cy has in store for her.
The rest is, quite honestly, kind of a massive blur, both because of how literally fast it is but also because of how dizzy and overwhelmed it makes Kate- Cy is effectively speedrunning sex with her, a concept she would probably find funny did she have the time and the clear mind to even think it. But all Cy puts on her mind is pleasure, pleasure, pleasure- it's relentless. f*ck, will anyone in her life ever know their way around her body with such expertise? It seems very unlikely.
After yet another roller-coaster of sensations between her legs, Kate finally tenses up for good and releases all at once. She's pretty sure she squirts a bunch but Cy's so quick to clean her up with a towel it barely even registers. By the time her mind feels clear again, her fly is already zipped back up and her hair has been lovingly patted down into a less suspiciously sexual looking hairstyle.
So, quietly, her legs still a little wobbly, Kate grabs her bag and tries to fix the wrinkles in her T-shirt as Cy gets to the door.
"Who's your favorite teacher?" he asks as he unlocks it.
"You are. And who's your favorite student?" Kate shoots back.
Cy smiles, the kind of big happy smile he can neither repress nor fake.
"You are." he says, and he opens the door for her to step out.
Kate feels light when she comes home that afternoon. She almost forgets half of her notebooks at school, skips to the bus stop, hums to herself as she opens the door to her bedroom. But then, as she forces herself to recollect the events of the day, she finds herself woefully incapable of repressing her sadness. Tears well up in her eyes, and soon it seems like it's never going to stop. It feels less like crying and more like tears are just… spilling out of her, sorrow bursting out of a body she already finds too big, like there's just not enough room inside of her to contain such pain.
She spent so long looking down on Ms. Forester, pitying her and mocking her for not being good enough to be able to keep her husband to herself, not realizing that if the wife Cy loves so much isn't enough to satisfy his hunger, then no one is, especially not Kate. She's not enough and she never will be. f*ck, it hurts. It hurts so damn much.
Kate finds herself wondering if Cy broke up with her today– surely, no one talks about wanting to stay friends with their lover if they're not breaking up. But then again, they were going to have to break up anyway, weren't they? What kind of idiot would Kate be, going off to college and not trying to date anyone on the off chance her affair with her high school Math teacher turns into something significant? And she doesn't even know what a (not-so-)long-distance relationship would have looked like. She grew so close to Cy because they were spending so much time together. With that gone, she has no idea what their relationship is gonna turn into, especially since she plans on actually working hard for her degree. She's spent so long feeling dumb, she wants to prove to herself she can be smart without anyone's help and have what it takes to prove it to others too.
As she comforts herself with plans for the future and reminisces about her fondest high school memories, she gets a text from Cy and laughs so hard she wakes up one of her brothers.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chronophilia
As you can see, the cutoff age for pedophila is considered to be around 11 years old, whereas ephebophilia pertains to ages ranging from 15 to 19.
cy its 3am
This man is most unserious. Suddenly, Kate remembers what he said about how being nice and being an asshole weren't mutually exclusive, and finally she gets it. He's endearing in his sh*ttiness. And so, in spite of everything, Kate decides she still likes him.
The day Kate turns 18, she walks into a tattoo parlor and tries to get things she won't regret- she ends up settling on a raven (dark and mysterious, like her) and vines (fierce and resilient, also like her). It hurts way less than she expected, which she chalks up to building up a decent pain tolerance from self-harming for so long. Well, no more. She hasn't cut in years, but now it's official: only beautiful things are allowed to decorate her arms.
Unexpectedly, she ends up having an argument with Maggie. They were supposed to hang out together but apparently the girl is mad that Kate got Jonah's phone number and didn't even tell her. Then there was that dumb joke, where Mags congratulated her on being old enough to vote as well as 'other things', and she took Kate's assertion that she's well versed in 'other things' already very personally for some reason. This seems all so dumb and petty that Kate just told her to f*ck off and decided to spend the rest of her day alone, as tempting as calling Cy may have been.
And credit where credit is due, Cy did propose to spend some time with her, but she declined because she felt like she needed this day to herself.
As she eats a slice of her birthday cake, she tries to figure out how many other students Cy has slept with.
"Guess I can start by crossing Mags off that list." she thinks to herself.
She wonders if maybe people would want to rescind the many teaching awards Cy has won across the years if they knew what he does with the girls he tutors.
She can't say his methods don't work, though.
you ever think about death
What brought this on?
idk just being emo
I don't think about death all that much to be honest. I don't think I'm going to care once I'm dead, since, you know.
youll be dead
Yeah.
ive been trying to sort you into heaven or hell and while the latter is a very tempting option im still stuck honestly
Feeling Christian all of a sudden?
lol feeling godly would be more appropriate to the question
but no
idk
morals are difficult
Let it be Purgatory, then, while you're figuring things out.
lol good solution
so you're not worried abt death? at all?
Like I said, I won't care once I'm dead.
I do worry about aging, though.
really?
More than I'd like to admit.
well you're admitting it to me right now
Yeah, because I can't lie to you.
That gives Kate a little pause.
fr?
What?
for real?
Oh.
Yes, for real.
I don't know, it's hard not to be honest with you. Lying would feel like a waste of time honestly, like an insult to our relationship.
that's quite a risque thing to text your student mr forester
i could screenshot this sh*t yknow
Oh, I know.
and you don't mind?
I think we've established I am dumb enough to do this type of thing with you, yes.
can you tell me the name of the last woman you had sex with, beside me or your wife
ok maybe that was a bit out of line
cy?
Sorry, I was making coffee.
That is a bit uncomfortable to talk about.
hm
Her name is Jane.
oh sh*t
uuuh
from AP calculus?
No, but you might have had Spanish class with her.
.....
oh THAT jane
ok ok ok
is it weird that im asking?
As uncomfortable as this is, no, I don't think it's weird.
You have a right to know.
…To a point.
lmao
im guessing i cant ask about what kinda stuff you two do
Smart as ever.
....
well
what brought you two together
She came to me crying one afternoon after a bad break-up.
I consoled her the best I could, then she kissed me.
I think she'd had a crush on me for a while when that happened.
It took me by surprise, I didn't know how to react at first.
She's a really bright woman.
It felt nice, bringing a smile to her face.
I shouldn't be telling you any of this.
yeah
im weirdly glad you did though
I know it isn't right.
I know I should do better.
but you like the attention?
Yeah. And feeling needed.
hm
Is that shallow?
a bit yeah
but then again im the same so who am i to talk
I don't think you're shallow.
Are you saying you only like me because I give you attention?
Kate stops to think for a second. That sounds wrong.
no no way
i think
i think i like you because you're really kind and smart and funny
and uh
idk why that's embarrassing to admit but
you're also really attractive
(kill me)
Ha ha
I appreciate the compliment!
i sound shallow af
No you don't.
why do YOU like me
Cy takes way longer to respond than usual, so Kate goes downstairs to make herself some hot chocolate.
You're spunky, funny, charming, earnest. You're passionate about the things you like. You're much smarter than you give yourself credit for.
And beyond that, I feel like you 'get me', as childish as that might sound.
Whenever we spend time together, I feel a connection I don't really get anywhere else. I feel like myself around you.
well sh*t
that's not shallow at all
I guess it isn't.
so you like ms. alegria bc she threw herself at you in a time of need
and me bc of… all that stuff you just listed
Yes.
is it fair to say im the favorite in this situation
cy?
You made me laugh while I was drinking coffee.
omg
You're gonna kill me with a text one of these days.
take me to court
wait no you can't, you'll be dead
god you're right worrying about death is stupid literally nothing happens afterwards
I am trying hard not to wake up my wife and you're making it very difficult.
let her fight me about it
1 on 1 let's f*cking go
mano a mano
i can take her
i have the weight advantage
plus shes too tall she won't see me coming
You're ridiculous.
i will naruto run around her mark my words
You need to be stopped.
And yes, obviously, you are the favorite.
aaand that's a knockout chief
hey
Cy
Yes?
how can you be so calm
like
i am sitting on a nuclear bomb right now
just a gigantic f*cking pile of damning evidence
how do you know i won't rat you out
I don't.
why the f*ck did you even tell me the truth
you could've lied you know
i wouldnt even judge you for that honestly
id lie if i were you
sh*t, id even threaten me with posting the nudes i sent you online or something
You honestly think I would do that?
no, of course not
god
cy im still so f*cking mad at you like
you have no idea
it's driving me f*cking crazy
every day
just looking at other girls in class
wondering if you're dating them too
if you charmed them too
if they too naively think they're the only one
like what is it
do you think you can simply f*ck around and not find out
just walk away free of consequences
Katey, the best part of f*cking around is finding out.
hahahahaha sooooo funny
im having a blast at your comedy show it’s all just sooooo fun
You do tend to treat everything like a joke.
you may think im joking rn but im not
this is serious
i could send your ass to jail do you realize that
I do.
I still don't regret telling you.
why?
Because you were brave enough to ask.
And because I care about you too much to lie.
that's insane
you're insane
you're so lucky you're so strong and tall cuz if you weren't i would beat your ass
cy
Yes?
am i really the favorite
whatever the hell that means anyway
Remember when I told you I hadn't crushed on anyone else this strongly since my wife?
yeah
There's your answer.
You know, there's this concept in chess, we call it "zugzwang".
It's German.
(Obviously.)
Literally, it means "to be forced to make a move".
It's used to describe a situation where a player is in such trouble, whatever move they make will only make things worse for them.
There is no way out for them in that turn, all they can do is play and watch as they give their opponent a big advantage with nothing in return.
and how often does that happen in your life
When playing chess with my wife? Quite often.
Outside of it? Very rarely.
But it does happen still.
Kate, whatever you choose to do?
It will be the right thing.
you won't say that when you get questioned by cops with handcuffs around your wrists
I mean it.
Whatever you think is the right thing to do, you can do it. I won't get mad.
I just want you to know my feelings for you were always genuine, alright?
okay
i love you
"...Oh, come on, Anderson- you couldn't even wait for the end of the ceremony?"
Kate almost chokes on the blunt she just lit in the parking lot of her soon-to-be former high school and planned on smoking to ease her nerves a little. The place is totally deserted, she didn't think she'd get caught.
"Come on, give me that." the woman says, and it's only as she enters Kate's field of vision and confiscates the blunt that Kate realizes who she is.
"Wha- Miss Forester?" she yelps.
This is quite possibly the worst person she could've ever been caught by with weed, and yet, much to Kate's surprise, Ms. Forester… brings the joint to her lips and takes a very long drag.
Um… holy sh*t??
Very casually, she gestures to the nearest wall with a nod of her head and invites Kate to go sit down with her against it. The two slump down like old friends. Kate thinks she might be hallucinating.
"Ah… You know, you're really smart, Kate." her former History teacher says as she slowly exhales a big cloud of smoke. "I'm sorry I never found a way to get you interested in History."
Kate wants to tell her "you did, actually", but it would feel a little mean-spirited– technically, she only got into History after she got a new teacher.
Ms. Forester lets the smoke settle and as she takes another hit, Kate finds herself overcome with honesty.
"...Sorry I f*cked your husband." she blurts out.
There's a beat, and, against all odds, as Kate is trying to figure out a way to backtrack and spin what she just stupidly said into a prank, Ms. Forester just… laughs.
Huh?
"It's funny," the woman muses, "it's always the teens who apologize to me, never the adults." And before the enormity of that sentence even has the time to sink in for Kate, Ms. Forester adds "Weirdly enough, that gives me hope for your generation."
She takes another drag as Kate is just… dumbfounded. Ms. Forester knows. She's known all along.
"...Was it worth it, at least?" she asks, and she just looks so tired.
"Honestly, yeah. " Kate answers bluntly. "Cy's like, really cool. Weird creep stuff aside."
Ms. Forester snorts.
"Yeah, I know, that's why I married him."
Kate doesn't know how to feel about all this. For 3 years, Ms. Forester has been her secret love rival, and the woman just… doesn't give a sh*t. Kate expected anger when she confessed just now, not this weirdly casual conversation and this feeling of… almost sisterhood, in a way. She's only now starting to realize the magnitude of Cy's transgressions, and it feels… bittersweet.
She's not special, but she also kind of is, in a way. She's one of many exceptions, only she's the biggest. It's hard to tell whether she should find that valuable or not.
"Come on, let's go, we don't want you to miss your graduation ceremony."
As she follows her former History teacher back to the graduation ceremony, Kate can't help thinking " Oh no, why is she so cool?"
While everyone is busy celebrating, they unceremoniously and wordlessly decide to meet up behind the school bleachers. When Cy comes to congratulate her, she's already removed her graduation gown- underneath it is a baggy T-shirt she's tucked into a rather form-fitting pair of jeans. For the first time in a while, Kate's arms are almost completely bare, and her tattoos are apparent. Funnily enough, while Cy visibly does immediately notice them, he makes no mention of it.
"So, I guess this is goodbye." Kate says bravely as she tries to stand as straight as possible, although no amount of posture correction will ever make her even begin to catch up on Cy's freakish height.
"So it is." Cy says very softly. "Not farewell, though, hm?"
Kate swallows.
"Of course not." she says with a shake of her head. "I… I like you too much."
Cy gives her a delicate, gentle smile as he leans in to tuck a stray lock of hair behind her ear.
"You're about to spread your wings and fly on your own. I'm really looking forward to it."
"Really?"
"You have no idea how proud of you I am."
In an instant, the mask of cool-headed maturity Kate tried to put on melts and she lunges to hug him with her full strength, and with no hesitation, Cy wraps his arms around her and hugs her back.
"You were my rock, man. This whole time." she weeps into his chest, slightly staining his shirt with her makeup. His embrace gets tighter.
"It was my honor." Cy says. "Thank you for letting me help you."
Kate swallows.
"Well, you're gonna help more students when I'm gone, huh? I wonder who will take my place." she mutters.
"There is no taking 'your place', Katey. I… You're genuinely special to me. I'll never look for a replacement." Cy says, oh so softly.
Kate pulls away a little to look him in the eye.
"You mean that?"
"I promise. I know you're gonna be away for a while, but… Whenever you come home, know that you can call me, and I'll find time for you. You'll always be important to me."
Kate holds back her tears. She loves him so much.
"...Can I kiss you?" she finally blurts out after staying silent for too long.
Cy smiles at her.
"Why couldn't you?" he says gently.
"I don't know, we could get caught."
"You're eighteen, and I'm technically not even your teacher anymore."
"And yet you still like me."
Cy smirks.
"At the risk of repeating myself, I don't have a schoolgirl fetish, Katey." he says.
Kate swallows.
"Okay. Okay."
"Yeah?"
"I won't report you."
Cy blinks.
"You decided that just now?" he says, a bit taken aback.
"I don't know. I just wanted you to know. In case you were worried." Kate mutters, blushing.
"I appreciate it." Cy says, and he leans in to give her the most tender kiss she's ever received.
